“The world is not respectable; it is mortal, tormented, confused, deluded forever; but it is shot through with beauty, with love, with glints of courage and laughter; and in these, the spirit blooms timidly and struggles to the light amid the thorns.”
-George Santayana
Humans are messy and delusional. We all have a life full of stories, mistakes and flaws; nonetheless, life gives us the opportunity to experience love, authenticity, joy, and selflessness. It is fairly easy to know oneself, we have the harrowing privilege to live with ourselves day in and day out. What is difficult is allowing another person to express exactly who they are, flaws and all. Relationships of all kinds are complicated; we idealize people, we ignore what they tell us and we put them in a box because we have this “concept” of who we want them to be. I think one of the most beautiful experiences is giving someone the space to openly show us who they are. Honestly this is why I fall in love with people, I like their light and darkness, their stories, their struggles, their goofy side, their silly quirks, their personalized spunk for life. Too often we get caught up in trying to find a neat place to fit someone, instead they spill all over. While trying put them back in the box we miss who they really are at their core.
I am lucky enough to know some pretty amazing people. These people are unique souls that enhance my life and encourage me to become a better person. I enjoy moving beyond the surface of casual relationships, this creates a genuine connection and it begins to peel back the layers of someone. I feel privileged when someone opens up and shows me their true colors. However life gets complicated and we have this innate ability to put up blinders and miss the big picture. Sometimes insecurities scream so loudly that we forget we are only human. In this moment I enjoy having the opportunity to tell someone how much I appreciate exactly who they are and I wouldn’t have them any other way.
I think one of the saddest things is when someone opens up and shares themselves with another and they get shut down, rejected, or criticized; or when they feel like they constantly have to apologize for who they are. In this moment we lose some of our sparkle because we think it isn’t desirable. In my opinion we need to fight to remain authentic in such a repressed mundane society. Not everyone will like you or agree with what you are doing, do it anways. When you find the people who accept you for exactly who you are, hot mess and all, hold tight. At the end of the day it isn’t about what you did 10 years ago, if you got a new tattoo, what your favorite color is or if you are gay; it is about discovering what moves you, laughing, thriving, and experiencing life in this moment. I think it is a true mark of courage when someone can honestly be themselves fearlessly.
Granting someone the space to be themselves allows them to flourish and a beautiful relationship grows from this place. The more we start to realize that no one is perfect the more we are able to build meaningful honest relationships with ourselves and others. This takes practice and patience; but I believe understanding and acceptance is key. Everything will fall into place easily because we won’t have these silly expectations or false perceptions. I think it is important to shake up the way we think and challenge the norm. When you live outside of the box life becomes a bit more colorful and you start to see yourself and other people differently. Be bold, don’t let others dull your colors.
LauraBrown-out-loud 